Notes on life around upholstery & design

When my older daughter hears the word growth she gets this look on her face like, “oh Lord, here we go”. It makes me grin at this point, but there were many years when it didn’t. She views growth the way I used to, with a negative spin on it. She thinks that growth is a synonym for difficult and/or painful. Is she right? I have had my time grappling with this and have come up with a spin of my own. 

Mindset Shift

I was in a rural economic development meeting when my way of thinking was challenged and ultimately changed. Being in a small town has its charm but it also has its challenges. Take town purists for example. This group of people operate in nostalgia. They have a hard time moving forward with new ideas that will bring growth to the town. There’s that word again, growth. This group is afraid it will change what the town is at its core. They are looking at it like it is an inherently negative thing but, is it?

According to a 2nd generation towny with a successful business, it is not. It is not inherently positive either though. Growth is exactly that, growth. It is not good or bad, it just is. (Kind of like math in my opinion.) What a profound way of looking at something that challenges things like your well-being, mindset, or way of life. Instead of it being forced upon you it becomes something you choose. You get to choose the spin you put on it, and I choose to make it positive.

Mistakes or Discoveries?

I have made my fair share of mistakes and leaps since my Lifequack two years ago. From moving twice, to trying to end a successful career because of burnout, to getting married quicker than what society approves of. There is a lot to unpack there but you’ll have to read about that one in a coming blog post. The point here is that I have been in a season of growth. I am actively choosing to see my mistakes as discoveries and when I can’t, lessons.

For nine months I was an active real estate agent. It was, for the most part, an awful experience. I learned a few things about myself though that I would not have otherwise. Turns out, I am not a transactional person. I need the relationship, the bond that comes with what I do as an upholsterer and shop owner. That’s a good thing! I also learned that I am lacking in the discipline and consistency department. Okay, I kind of already knew that but having it put in front of me so plainly has been helpful (and a little painful). Lastly, I learned that if something doesn’t fit it doesn’t mean I failed. That is a tough one for me. I spent months battling that until finally I chose to listen to my loving husband. To see it as an experience to learn from, and learn I have!

Here’s the rewrite!

These last two years of growth have taught me so much about myself. I am more risk-adverse than the next guy, which can get me in trouble…or it can be a blessing. My curiosity is a good thing, when tempered with research and a solid pro/con list. Stopping something in an effort to find a new path is not wrong but it is painful. Re-starting something I tried to let go of is just as painful, but I have gained a new point of view from it. I am a little softer with myself because of the choices I made in my state of immense growth.

When you’re in a situation that feels like it should be seen negatively, try taking the emotion away entirely. See it for what it is and that’s it. Growth is growth, math is math, competition is competition. Nothing more, nothing less…until you decide it is. And if you didn’t need a lesson or moral from this post then I would like to say thanks for reading it anyway! As always, I appreciate you and look forward to our next chat! 

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